preparing...

Today the theme seemed to center around being a mother. Usually, this topic doesn't phase me. I think... "Meh. I'll be a mother someday. I have plenty of time to learn these things before I'll even begin thinking about becoming a mother." But as we began to talk about preparing to be a mother, I realized I had much to learn and room to grow. Even if marriage and kids is far down the road.

In Relief Society, we talked about things we've learned from our own mother's that we'll teach our future kids, as well as things we've learned as we've grown up that we'll bring into our home. This made me think of all of the things that I want my family to do and be. I instantly thought of all of the little spirits that the Lord was going to trust me with and I felt both excited and scared. Excited to have little mini me's and my future hubby.... and scared beyond belief to raise children in this crazy world.

As I began making a personal list of the things I would bring to the table for my family... I realized these were things that would take years of practice and preparation. Nothing that would just change over night. I would have to begin preparing now.

The thought scared me. Preparing to be a mother now?? Having kids obviously isn't something I'm thinking about right now... I'm not dating anybody. Which means no marriage anytime soon. Which means no children. So obviously becoming a mother hasn't been something I've thought about recently. Until I stared at my list of attributes and qualities I want to have as a mother... and realized it was going to take a lot of time, practice, and energy to become the woman, wife, and mother I want to someday be.

I was talking to my sister in my grandmother's kitchen today about our recent dealings with men. She made the comment that I was now in the stage of life where I'm looking at the attributes in a man that I want for a husband. The men I date, hold hands with, and even kiss... are potential husbands for me. Little does she know... the men she's dating are potentials for her as well. Anyway. Once she made this comment, I realized how right this young girl was... and the thought scared me, yet again.

Of course, I thought; I'm only 19. Marriage is a long way down the road. But as I thought of the kind of wife I want to be for my husband and the kind of man I want my husband to be, I realized that just like becoming a mother... I'd have to begin preparing now.

As you think of the kind of woman, wife, and mother you want to eventually become, you'll realize the preparation needs to begin now. And the preparing and learning will never stop. I know that I want to be as ready as I can be to marry a husband for time and all eternity in the house of the Lord and as ready as I can be to bring some sweet spirits to this earth.