think pretty thoughts

I was roaming around Walmart, trying as hard as I could to fill my shopping cart with healthy food and essentials. However, the "you're-a-stressed-out-and-poor-college-student" cap came on and my cart was instead piled with the comfort food staples: mac and cheese, dill pickle chips, and mint brownie ice cream. Upon realizing that this shopping trip had strayed so far from it's original intent, I decided to continue wandering around the store.

After strolling idly down the sock aisle attempting to find more mismatched pairs to add to my collection and stopping to feed my addiction to scented candles, I found myself in the 'Home Office' section. I glanced at all of the fun new gadgets and decadent pens and walked by the journals. My eye caught the attention of one in particular. On it, in gold cursive lettering, were the words: "Think Pretty Thoughts". I picked up the journal and thumbed through its pages. After concluding that this journal would most likely go to waste, I put it back on the shelf and continued down the aisle.

It didn't take much to convince myself that I needed this little book in my life and that I could somehow find good use for it, so I circled back around and snatched up the last journal before anybody else could.

Just as I had originally suspected, this little journal sat, neglected, in my car for quite some time. Occasionally I would pick it up and wonder what I could fill its pages with. Thoughts and ideas would formulate, but nothing excited me enough to actually begin writing.

Until I found myself having a bad day. A really bad day.

It was one of those bad days where not even chocolate and good 80's music could lift my spirits. I huffed and puffed while I drove to work and determined that this would be the worst. day. ever. I began listing off all of the reasons why my life was boring, unpleasant, or unfair. I thought about all of the negative things that had happened and found myself wishfully wanting for what others seemed to so easily attain.

I sat down in my cubicle, unzipped my bag, and started unloading the pounds of textbooks. I peered into the dark abyss that is my backpack and noticed the journal I had bought a week previously. I reached in and took it out, looking at it's cover.

Think Pretty Thoughts

I opened up the journal, took out a pen, and wrote: I'm thankful...

I paused. What am I thankful for? I sat back in my chair and glanced down at the blank page. I sourly thought: I'm not thankful for anything today, because today is just awful. The journal sat open at my desk for the rest of the day. Eventually I forced myself to write a sentence down.

"I'm thankful for my job."

I looked down at the five words and thought: Come on. You can do better than that.

By the end of the work day I had written three pages worth. Things like, "I'm thankful for the opportunity I have to receive an education" or "I'm thankful for whoever thought to put peanut butter and chocolate together" filled up the pages. I chuckled to myself as I realized that just a few hours previous I had complained that nothing good was going to happen that day.

This little journal proved that I couldn't have been more wrong. I suddenly became much more aware of all that the Lord has so graciously and generously blessed me with. No longer was I counting the things going wrong, but I was counting the things going right.

And it made such a difference.

Writing in this journal became a daily habit.. As soon as I got to work I'd open it up and begin listing out the things that I was already thankful for that day. I noticed that the time I used to spend wishfully wanting and griping for the things that I didn't have was replaced with scouting for all of the things that I could write down in my journal.

As I look back on the past few months that have been documented in this journal, I've noticed that life has become so much happier. That's not to say that the bad days have stopped coming, because they definitely do. I still binge watch Netflix and splurge on JCW's shakes while I rock out in my mom van attempting to cheer myself up. But the days are much easier to get through when I find myself in search of the good.